Noted

My friend Sarah invited me to a dinner party at her house tonight.

Since I know Sarah is a hardcore tea drinker like myself, I brought her a four ounce jar of the honey we harvested yesterday as a host gift. Initially, I was a little bit stressed that I might have to bow out of dinner if it was going to be a potluck. After last weekend’s budget blowing dinner party at our house, our party food shelf in the pantry is looking kind of sparse. Luckily, Sarah was taking care of the entire meal but asked me to bring some wine to share.

Alcohol is one food product that cannot be purchased with food stamps. And by weird luck, booze is actually a surplus item in our household.

Neither Mr. Foxypants nor I drink. But, you wouldn’t know this by looking at our overstuffed liquor cabinet. Free bottles of booze is a perk (or hazard) of being a DJ. At the end of every big event or wedding, we’re always offered at least a free bottle of wine. Wine also appears to be the go-to generic gift of most of the population. We’re always getting wine in gift bags from business associates and acquaintances. Also, because our circle of friends know we don’t drink, they all tend to bring extra booze over to our parties to share with other drinkers, and as a result, we always end up with more beer and Jack Daniels (WTF?) in the house after the party than what we started with.

If it were up to me, I’d get rid of all the booze and start using the built in liquor cabinet in the dining room to hold knitting supplies, or extra canned goods, or something that I’d actually use and not have to dust all the time. It’s actually starting to get annoying. A client gave us a half gallon bottle of Hennessy Bras Arme Cognac that sells for several hundred dollars on ebay. It’s too tall to fit on the shelves inside the kitchen cabinets or the liquor cabinet, so it sits in our dining room, out in the open, like a shrine to 2pac, or something. I’d love to sell this bottle, or give it to someone who really appreciates cognac, but Mr. Foxypants is weirdly protective of the bottle. He won’t sell it, as if he’s got plans to throw a cognac-themed party, like, ever.

Actually, Mr. Foxypants, like a lot of men I know, is proud of the bar set up, which in our house exists almost solely as a bottle collection. This fixation existed before Mad Men, so I cannot blame television, sadly. What’s with guys and home bars anyway? It’s kind of like men and huge televisions. I have plenty of girlfriends who own large televisions, and I have yet to have to sit through a lecture from any of them about “aspect ratio” or “true blacks.” But back to the bar situation–Mr. Foxypants, as a non-drinker, cannot explain the importance of having a full bar, so I’m left to guess that the liquor cabinet is basically the adult man version of my childhood cardboard play kitchen with Easy Bake Oven. It’s enjoyable because it’s aspirational.

At any rate, I brought over two bottles of cabernet that we got from a napa valley wedding last summer and a bottle of Night Train that had been given to us a a joke. Neither were drunk with dinner. Which is fine by me because I managed to get three bottles out of the house in one fell swoop. Score! But it left me wondering. 100% of the wine that we give as gifts is regifted. I’m sure that 50% of the wine we receive as gifts are just regifts from other people. (Either that or I just look like the type of girl who loves to drink rose). So exactly what percentage of wine is actually enjoyed vs. what percentage of wine is just the liquid form of fruitcake, and passed from party host to party host?

Saturday Menu
Brunch: Coffee, chilaquiles with eggs, fizzy lemonade
Dinner: Me: (at Sarah’s house) scallops wrapped in bacon, pasta with creamy prosciutto sauce, green salad and fresh strawberries with homemade panna cotta, mineral water, coffee. Mr. Foxypants: Pizza and soda (free from DJ job)